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  • Jason Ready

Oh Bollards


Whilst in a remote area looking for a house name I parked up next to a small triangle green as the sat nav was not being very helpful. I re-read my instruction to locate the property and realised that I had to do a sharp left to go up the hill and the property was 3rd house on the left.

I ate half a sandwich and took a swig of my drink then turned the engine on and maneuvered the van left only to discover that I wasn’t going anywhere. I thought I may have been slightly on the grass and my wheels were spinning. I revved the engine up more and they continued to spin but at the same time I could hear a crunching and grinding noise to the left side of the van and wondered what an earth was going on as I could not see any obstructions in my left side mirror.

I got out of the van only to realise that someone had placed one of those really irritating bollards(!) about 1 foot tall right on the edge of this small green and I was grinding the side door into it and going nowhere. Fortunately no major damage to the van and a quick trip to the garage and the dent was banged out with a rubber mallet. As for the bollard, it is still there in good condition going strong.

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